In a conversation yesterday, a friend asked me if I knew the difference between honesty and authenticity. I had to mull it over for a while, but all my experiences with life coaching provided me an answer.
Honesty is really about being true to yourself and with yourself and from there extending that to other people. Honesty involves being responsible for how you feel, what you want, and how you act, but also the consequences of all of those. Honesty is learning to face who you are and accept that person and then grow.
Authenticity is how you present that honesty to the world. Being authentic does mean being in touch with yourself, but it also means living that truth in your thoughts, actions and words, hopefully in a way that honors both yourself and others. When you authentic you are re-presenting the honesty you have with yourself to others.
The difference is fine. A person can be honest, but not authentic. For example you know you hate your job, but instead of looking at all the options you stay at that job anyway. That’s honest, but inauthentic, because you are denying that honesty…and ignoring it’s effects on you and others around you.
Taylor Ellwood
March 24, 2008 at 10:06 pm |
Excellent clarity on the differences, I’ve been reading through your blog. Carloline Myss talks about this also in her latest.
As synchronicity would have it, I also came across the same fine tuning of definition from a therapist/author (Terry Real) who trains people in “relational skills.”
In terms of manifesting one’s vision, either a whole life vision or just a component, I don’t think manifestation will occur in alignment with vision if there is pervasive inauthenticity. In fact, the deep work done to achieve a life goal may even turn around to bite you in the !@#. Because at a certain level of working, one really has not been honest if ones actions are deeply inauthentic. In other words, if a person really does know better, than they need to be “doing” better. So I guess for a life coach, that is probably an issue that might need clarification with a client from the beginning.
Maybe that “dischronicity” between vision and reality is what happens when you get, “That wasn’t what I asked for!” The “God has a sense of humor” results.
This is an issue I happen to be dealing with head on at the moment.
March 24, 2008 at 11:34 pm |
I think sometimes what you’re working on does indeed turn around and bite you because what you think you want isn’t really what you want. As you go deeper and deeper into what you’re working on, you can find changes occurring which completely reshape what you thought you wanted.